Missing Piece

Yesterday Hailey and I went to go and visit my bestie and her little boys and her new baby girl. We had our normal "if... you know if you want... another baby" talk. This is a normal conversation that usually pops up with pretty well everyone these days, and is the norm when I'm visiting my BFF. I guess it's only natural for people to wonder, we did go ahead and have a child so naturally we would be having more then one. I don't blame all the people around us for questioning us, as we did originally talk about there being a possibility of two, well that was until we had the pleasure of parenting one! This is the year of the baby, or babies as most of my friends are reproducing like there is something in the water.

But this isn't the reason behind my blog today, this was infact inspired by a specific conversation I had yesterday with my best bud. She mentioned to me that some how there just was more love in her with each and every child she has had, and I get that. I hear it all the time that if you ever wondered if you would have enough love for more then one kid. She went on to explain that with her second she just felt the love the second he was handed to her, and with her third there was an intense connection before she was even laid on her chest. She also wondered if she was over thinking it as they finally have the "girl baby" they have always wanted. I went home and really thought about this, I knew the second H was handed to me that she was mine, and I loved her more then anything. So I never wondered about my capacity to love another baby. It got me to thinking that with my friend her situation was a little different, as they finally know that their family is complete with the birth of their third child, and that child being a little lady, you know the missing piece. I feel totally whole as a family of three, and maybe that's why there is just no burning desire for more. Sitting there holding the new little peanut I did have a little conversation to myself, and it went something like this "hum... maybe we could do this again" *in the background are three crazy toddlers fighting over balloons, screaming, crying, and running a muck* and that's when reality hit me "nah, just come for baby fixes when you feel this need" and simply handed baby back to mommy and broke up balloon fight.

Maybe it's just because it seems like everyone is literally "doing it" these days that if feel like I have to keep defending myself against the curious, and all the reasons "why" you simply can't have just one. With every week that passes it seems like we are getting rid of something else we should be keeping "just in case" I feel that we are making the best decision for us. I know this may change, and would delight a few people, we are open to changing our position but that dream gets a little foggier with every passing day.

L